As little girls, we were introduced to the wonderful world of fairytales. That magical, happily ever after, that one day all of us would get to experience with ‘the one’. But after countless dates, terrible breakups, and getting slapped in the face with more than one reality check, I blame all the rom-coms and Disney movies for giving me unrealistic expectations about love.
When it comes to sex, however, porn is the driving force behind all our lackluster experiences in bed.
Had sex been as easy as what those glistening-muscled, hairless, sweat-less actors have been portraying for years, we would all live in a wonderful world of erotic bliss. Women’s sex toys wouldn’t have existed as something to get off on after every bad date, either.
Female ejaculation isn’t a complex math equation. It requires a little communication and some guidance – and you’ve got yourself a eureka moment!
The one mystical force behind this web of confusion about women getting off – is the squirt.
The Great Pyramid of Giza, the existence of Atlantis, and how to achieve a squirting orgasm. Truly, the great mysteries of our time.
There are plenty of questions surrounding this often complicated and always confusing topic.
Most of all, how can we get in on the action?
What is squirting?
I’m sure you’ve heard all these before:
“It’s just a myth that got popularized by porn!”
No, it’s real, I promise! But even if you do experience it, it’s just pee, right?
But is it? No, it can only happen if you have a specific prostate gland.
When diving into this big #SquirtingGate mystery, we need to focus on science. If you want to achieve an intense squirting orgasm, it’s important to understand where it comes from, to know how to achieve one.
You might have heard of the Skene’s gland. It’s what most sexologists and experts point to when it comes to what makes a woman squirt. Basically, it’s these tiny, microscopic holes in the labia minora, located right at the lower end of the urethra.
Hence, why you have a lot of people saying it’s just pee. Skene’s is very close to your bladder.
Now, not all women have them, and if they do, they don’t function exactly the same with everyone.
Another issue is the lack of research when it comes to female ejaculation. This means research varies across the board and what is currently ‘known’ may change as more studies are done. It’s kind of like all those different female sex toys – you just have to find the right one. So ladies, don’t feel bad about not understanding your own bodies sexually, because apparently a lot of scientists don’t either.
When it comes to the big question of ‘is it pee or not?’ – this is where things get even more complicated. Studies made in the 80s, 90s and as recently as a year ago, put even more question marks on the whiteboard around the words female ejaculation.
In short, results are so all over the place that there is no conclusive answer, not to mention that in all of these studies, only 40-50% of the women were able to have a squirting orgasm.
However, based on taste and smell, many are dead set in their conclusions – it’s definitely not pee.
How to achieve a squirting orgasm
Step one in anything sex related: make sure you’re comfortable. Whether you’re enjoying your own company with sex toys, have a partner with you or you want to collide the wonderful worlds of your man and female sex toys, it’s paramount to be in a relaxed state of mind.
Since clits work similarly to penises when it comes to arousal, make sure you have your nub of pleasure stimulated at all times. Tongue, fingers, yours, his… Just make sure those nerve endings keep pulsing. Sex experts will tell you it’s the best way to put enough pressure on the urethra to get your orgasm going.
From my personal experience, I would always recommend having sex toys around. Whether your preference is butt toys, vibrations or clasps, use whatever gets you going the most.
Female sex toys are a girl’s best companion in times of need, after all.
Make sure to have your G-spot moving. This is where the magic happens, where your inner clit and vagina meet at a wonderful intersection of screaming orgasms. To make things even better, the urethra passes through in this area, meaning if you combine all three, you’re in for a very wet time.
Build the pressure and move up-and-down. Anything with a curve works great. I would recommend using any of your favorite women’s sex toys to massage, tap or do a little ‘come here’ finger gesture – the latter being my personal favorite. Or, opt for a vibrator or two.
Remember, your squirting comes from those tiny holes in your urethra! If you feel a sudden urge to pee, that’s probably a very good sign.
Now, these are all the basics and what has worked for most women.
But remember that most doesn’t mean all! It’s a lengthy process of trying to find the right balance to hit the right spot.
That means you’re in for some very fun nights, with lots of time for yourself, equipped with a load of women’s sex toys to stimulate any spot that makes you feel good. Whether it’s getting those vibrations in, making your butt happy or enjoying your favorite position with your partner, this is the perfect time to experiment and see what frosts your cupcake the best.
The mysteries of female ejaculation may be a cloud of confusion for many scientists, but in our bedrooms, it’s just a matter of time and comfort.
Keep in mind, if you don’t succeed the first time, try, try again!
Yes, Christmas comes only once a year, but that doesn’t mean you have to, too!