Every girl knows the first sexual experience is special and extremely important! Deciding to join the world of women’s sex toys is like getting your flower taken for the second time, and it should be special and harmless. You should feel safe and secure, but you need to know what you’re buying to reach that level of safety. Your first dildo has to meet all your criteria and match both your personality and your vaginal shape.

Every girl is different – so are our vaginas, but each deserves the best treatment possible. That’s why you should follow some directions when buying a dildo for the first time – there is no best answer – only a right one! 

Believe me, if you had the time and patience to read every little detail about losing your virginity just to have three-second sex with some teenager while his parents weren’t home, you should also take some time to find your perfect first vibrator. 

Unlike the popular belief that a dildo is a dildo – you shove it in and cum, the reality is different. If you’re new in the sex toy world, you’ll be surprised by all the types and shapes of dildos on the market. Doing your research might mean discovering some new things about yourself! 

Remember: rule number-one with your first dildo is always patience. Every woman’s anatomy is different, so if a friend recommends you a toy that ‘blew her brains out’, it doesn’t mean it’ll do the same to you. You might even have to do a couple of ‘first ones’ only to find the one that will officially be named your first vibrator. 

Luckily, I’m here to guide you through some basics, so let’s dive into this detailed guide on what to consider when buying a dildo for the first time!

Do Your Research

As a beginner, you probably don’t know much about sex toys – if anything at all. If you walk into a sex shop without any idea of what you are looking for, the worker’s language will sound foreign to you. They will go on and on about different types of vibrators, dildos, beads and you will just stand there and nod, understanding nothing.

Then, to make that seller stop talking, you’ll probably just settle down with something you don’t know how to handle or use correctly. You’ll become the most disappointed girl in the world as soon as you try using it – and that sucks. 

That’s why you have this guide, but as a side note, you can also read about the types of dildos and you’ll eventually be ready for buying a dildo!

G-spot dildos

first dildo g spot dildo

The famous G-spot. 

Is it there? Does it exist? You’ve probably heard stories saying the G-spot doesn’t exist in reality. Well, in reality, your partner couldn’t find it or reach it… 

The G-spot exists, and there are dildos whose main purpose is stimulating your G-spot and making you cum like no man ever could. The vibrator is designed to stimulate the G-spot, but you might not find it either – at first. That’s not a big deal because you can use the same vibrator in multiple other ways. 

You can choose between small, big, or something in between. You can go beyond vibration and take a pulsator or thruster – the newest, most innovative technology. Consider these choices when buying a dildo, as they’re almost always motor-free, using magnets that repel one another to generate a thrusting motion. Not to mention they can be used hands-free!

Also, if you want to avoid buzzing, make sure your first dildo is made of stainless steel, borosilicate glass, or silicone. These materials are entirely body-safe and will keep your mind away from any motorized toys. 

If you don’t yet differentiate between safe and unsafe materials – don’t worry – there’s a whole chapter on that in this guide! 

Clit Suction Dildos

clit stimulating dildos

If you don’t know where your G-spot is, you definitely know where your clitoris is. 

I’m a big fan of clit suction vibrators, which don’t actually vibrate, using air pressure to indirectly stimulate your clitoris. Believe me, these things make are the reason why women and their sex toys are so inseparable. As you might imagine, clit sucker sex toys don’t make powerful buzzing sounds. They provide you with gentle sucking sensations all around your clit which boost your arousal and eventually bring you to multiple orgasms! 

The tip of your clitoris is gentle and many find it to be very contact-sensitive, and these dildos don’t touch it directly, so they’re perfect for it! Nozzle-shaped, they make sure the stimulation is contact-free, and although finding the sweet spot might take a while – it’s totally worth it!

Anal Dildos 

buy the first anal dildo

If you’re still looking for your first dildo, maybe anal is too much for you. However, if you’ve already tried anal with your partner, you might consider getting yourself an anal sex toy. If you’ve already tried anal in any way, with a penis or a finger, you know that the anus has plenty of nerve endings to please – so why give up on that fun?

The sex toy industry has a range of options for anal play – beads, butt plugs, anal dildos… You name it! Everyone is aware that by buying an anal dildo, you can also keep the satisfaction of vaginal penetration. 

There are even dildos specifically designed to stimulate your clitoris and anus at the same time – Rabbit Vibrators! And they don’t even look like dicks! So if that’s the case…

Who Said It Has to Be a Cock? 

A popular (and false) belief among newbies is that a vibrator is a dick-looking artificial thing that vibrates until you cum. Luckily for all of us, it’s not that simple! It doesn’t have to come in the shape of a cock, nor does it have to buzz. It doesn’t even have to vibrate!

I’m not trying to tell you that cocks are bad or that they should be avoided – if you love some meat, go for it! It’s just that the market offers so many design-centric dildos, it would be a shame to stick with your classic all the time. Today, women’s sex toys offer various technologies, not to mention shapes, sizes, and materials – and can be much more discrete than a 6-8 inch dick! 

Make Sure It’s Body-Safe

Once you know the types of dildos and all the various technologies out there, pay attention to the material: it has to be safe for your body! Today, the market offers a wide range of toys, with choices beyond imagination. However, phonies still plague the industry, so you have to make sure you’re getting the real thing. I’d only recommend you buy sex toys from approved and well-known brands, but I’d rather not exclude some fast-growing start-ups, so it would really be for the best if you learn the differences between safe and unsafe materials. 

So, let’s learn!

First of all, when buying your first dildo, you have to learn about the two broadest categories of materials used to produce sex toys: porous and non-porous

Porous Sex Toys 

Avoid these. If you browse sex toys on the Internet you’ll see ‘latex-free’ everywhere, as in: ‘it’s safe.’ Well, latex is a porous material, which means it retains something after use. Alongside latex, other often-used porous materials are: 

  • All rubbers including thermoplastic ones
  • Silicone blends
  • Polyvinyl chloride
  • Elastomers
  • Jellies
  • Cyberskins – replicas of real skin. 

It’s a long list, I know, but trust me – it’s worth memorizing! 

Body-safe materials should be rule-number-one when buying a dildo. Porous sex toys are usually soft, except for their hard plastic parts, but if that plastic isn’t ABS, it’s still porous. So what’s the biggest problem with porous dildos? Hygiene. These things are magnets for bacteria, as microbes get stuck on them and there’s practically no way to get them out. The only way to stop this from happening is to use the sex toy with a condom, which kinda defeats the purpose. 

Using a porous dildo increases the risk of a bacterial infection or even provoking an outbreak of a pre-existing sexually transmitted disease (STD). Next thing you know, you’ve given it to your partner and suddenly you’re done with women’s sex toys forever. With their low melting point, you cannot clean them in boiled water, and soap and water won’t do the trick either. So for your first vibrator, please be smart and just go for a non-porous one. Speaking of which…

Non-Porous Sex Toys

As you should already know, these are the materials your first dildo should be made of. 

The most common non-porous materials include ABS hard plastic, metal, pure silicone, ceramic, wood, stone, borosilicate glass (pyrex), and specially treated wood. 

What’s common to all of them? 

They’re hard and don’t have pores! As they’re made of hard materials, they’re very easy to clean in any way, and their lack of pores makes it hard for bacteria to stick onto them. 

However, you should be careful with your choice. If you’re looking for a silicone dildo, make sure it’s 100% silicone to ensure that your toy is 100% body-safe. The next material I would recommend is ABS plastic, which is very hygienic and feels silky-smooth, too! 

On the other hand, pyrex and metal are entirely different stories. They’re very similar to the metal ones, albeit a bit heavier, with high durability and temperature endurance. Due to the rigidness of these toys, they’re a lot smaller than those made of silicone, for example. However, the pleasure they provide is even bigger due to their unyielding structure, which ensures your G-spot is constantly caressed. 

To sum up: don’t worry. If you have a dildo made of borosilicate glass, it won’t break inside you.

Looks Are Important

physical characteristics of your first dildo

Although I like to say it’s the inside action that matters, I have to agree – the outside is equally important. 

When choosing your first vibrator, you have to choose one with appealing aesthetics – it’s just logical! Some studies have even shown that the looks of the sex toy directly affect the outcum

Just kidding, just kidding.

But you still have to get turned on first, which is probably the purpose for the existence of vibrators, so how will you manage to get to that point if the toy is rigid, unappealing, and even crude? There are no rules – desires are personal, and beauty is in the eye of the beholder! 

Practice Good Hygiene 

Buying a dildo is fun, but once you use it and reach that orgasm, you still have to clean it. 

Yup, no one likes this part but it’s very important – if you want to use that dildo again and not get infected! Different cleaners are used depending on the material, but for most women’s sex toys, hot water and soap will do the trick. Some require actual chemicals to keep them bacteria-free – either avoid them, or buy the chemicals. If you want to make sure your fun doesn’t turn into an obsessive doubt over your vagina’s health, spare an extra $10 for a sex toy cleaner and enjoy the ride! 

Pay Attention To The Features  

features of dildo for first time users

Once you have established the looks it is time to see the toy’s specifications. 

Today’s market offers a wide range of innovative technologies and you don’t have to put up with any loud buzzing vibrators! Most people like quiet, almost soundless sex toys, and that’s their priority when buying a dildo. Dildos today come with dozens of settings, all sorts of modes, and vibrating patterns. 

Choose one that offers you everything. Settle down with the one you can use for hours of playing and varying settings. Make sure it has a long battery life and that it’s USB rechargeable. Some dildos have complicated charging systems which can be very frustrating, especially if the battery drains in the middle of your sexy time. Of course, the best advice is to fully charge the toy before starting playing with it. 

Moreover, it would be a shame if your first dildo wasn’t waterproof, right? Almost all sex toys on today’s market are manufactured as waterproof, so make sure you don’t pick up the black sheep! As it’ll be your first one, I’m sure you’ll want to take it to some wet places, under the shower being the most obvious one! 

Don’t Be Cheap 

Usually, when people go searching for sex toys, they get shocked when they see the prices. I suppose people expect vibrators to be cheap because they look simple and are often tiny, but when buying a dildo, you should know that every sex toy you encounter was once just an idea. 

An idea someone had, to make you cum better, harder, and faster!

In order to make this idea a reality, you need to make a concept, then a design. After that, you’ll need to find a manufacturer, and finally create your prototype, which is then refined and improved until it’s a final product. In 2020, sex toys have more features than early computers, so it’s completely understandable why you can’t have them for $20. I’m not saying it is impossible to find cheap vibrators, but I wouldn’t recommend them. 

Moreover, the materials used for creating women’s sex toys are pretty pricey. So, prepare yourself to spend $100 on average if you want a real and quality first vibrator! Remember, this is an investment and once you buy some of the good stuff, you’ll thank me for this advice! 

Read the Reviews – Go Shopping in Person

first dildo reviews

I know it’s easier to order your first dildo online. It’s discrete and you have no contact with any actual people, making it easier for you to survive in this world full of prejudices. Unfortunately, sex toys are still taboo, which is why they arrive at your doorstep in vague packages, or you get offered discrete bags at sex shops to carry your product. 

Anyway, I would only suggest using the Internet to read user reviews about the products you like, and then going to see them in person. People’s personal experiences are the most important, but their knowledge of the quality of the product is poor. Fortunately, we live in an era where female-friendly sex shops exist, where selling is education-based, and products are freely available and on display. 

When you pick up the toy you chose, turn it on, hear the buzz, feel its weight – you’ll instantly know if that’s your first vibrator!

Whatever You Do Don’t Forget the Lube

Lubricants should always be used during sex – I cannot stress this enough! 

Regardless of your partner being involved or you’re enjoying some alone-time, regardless of how sexually excited we are, our vaginas can still be dry. This can be caused by stress, wild hormone levels, or taking certain medications. Your inside tissues are sensitive and you don’t want to hurt yourself by shoving up a sex toy in the dust. 

That’s why lubricants are always the best option, preferably water-based ones. These are usually recommended as the safest ones, as they won’t react to your dildo of choice or any women’s sex toys for that matter, and can be reactivated with a drop of water or saliva if they start to dry out. 

Hopefully, you had a good read, and you’re now prepared to buy your first dildo. Just follow the given steps and you’ll make the right choice – it’s just product selection!

Whatever you pick, remember – your body, your rules, your orgasms.

Stay feisty.

Stay naughty.

Stay Devine.