Fingering is perhaps the most underrated sex activity and I find that to be very sad. No matter if it’s foreplay or the main event, fingering orgasms can be super pleasurable – for both parties. And you can get creative with it too. Whether trying out different poses, or employing two hands instead of one, the possibilities are endless and up to your imagination.
But for the safety of your partner’s vagina and their mindblowing orgasm, there are a few tips that are important to know if you’re new at it. Because, you wouldn’t want to give her a BV on top of fingering her badly, do you?
So let’s dive in the very basics of hot to finger a woman, en route to becoming a seasoned lover!
Wash your hands and cut your nails!
I shouldn’t be saying this but in light of recent events with the pandemic and all – it seems it bears repeating. Wash your hands! The vaginal area is very sensitive so you could easily introduce bacteria during fingering.
By the same token, your long nails could potentially damage the soft lining of the vaginal but could also lead to vaginal infections. So by trimming your nails and washing your hands before giving a girl a fingering orgasm, you’ll reduce the chances of injury or an infection.
Get to know the Vagina
I’d assume you’re already introduced to the basic female anatomy by now but as we all know, it’s made to order. Meaning, no two vaginas you encounter in life will be the same.
They come in all shapes, sizes and textures so it would be a good idea to get to know the vagina before fingering it. Some girls have sensitive and tighter openings, some need more lube and some don’t need it at all. So take your time and get to know the vagina you’re about to touch – it’s the least you could do when someone’s vagina is hospitable to your fingers!
Start off slow
The vagina is technically a hole, more like a tunnel, but that doesn’t mean you should drill it like searching for gold! Don’t push in two or three fingers at once either! You might potentially injure your partner and there’s nothing that kills the mood than rough fingering.
Start off slow by caressing the clitoris or the lips, get it all nice and wet before you start fingering. Starting off slow helps set the mood and arouse your partner in a tantric foreplay. There is no need to rush, at least not at the beginning so take your time to explore your partner’s vagina and to maximize the sensations.
Build up a rhythm
You’ll probably be tempted after a while to increase speed as you get feedback from your partner. You’ll probably be thinking that if you suddenly go faster and faster, your partner will eventually climax. This is a no-no, especially if you’ve entered her as if to unclog it!
Instead, try to build up to a rhythm that will lead to a mind blowing orgasm. If you start off slow, you can build up the tension by adding more fingers or speed in your thrust. If you want to bring her to a mind-blowing fingering orgasm, build up to it!
“Come hither”
Ah, that ever elusive G-spot that even many vagina owners still think is a myth. Let me tell you it’s real, it exists and yes it does cause toe-curling orgasms. So if you want to be a pro at fingering, you need to be able to find it and hit it!
The G-spot can vary from woman to woman, so you’ll have to touch around to find it. But plainly put, if you use a “come hither” motion with your finger, you’ll be able to locate it. Remember – the G-spot is not a button to be pushed, rather an area that makes a woman feel really, really good. Try the “come hither” motion right and you just might watch your partner come undone all over your fingers.
Use your other hand as well
Luckily we’ve been blessed with two hands and if one can make your partner come, imagine what two can do! Don’t be afraid to use your other hand too. Whether it’s for nipple stimulation or for some clit loving, the other hand should be active as well.
For example, while you’re fingering your partner with one hand, the other is free to roam around. So try to maybe pinch her nipples, rub her clit or if you’re both into it – couple it with anal fingering too. And when it comes to anal play, since double dipping is a no-no, you can use both hands to simultaneously play with both holes.
Listen to your partner
And last but certainly not least, listen to your partner! And when I say listen, I really do mean clear your ears and listen to all the sounds that your partner makes. All the little sighs and whimpers, moans and screams should be your feedback to what you’re doing when fingering her.
Whether it’s good or bad, or whether you’re getting your partner to an orgasm, you’ll know by listening. Listen to all the non-verbal signals that your partner makes and you’ll know if you’re getting close to your destination.
Conclusion
Sex is all about pleasure and exploration of your partner’s dbody and desires so you should treat it as such. There’s nothing wrong about being new at something, as long as you’re willing to learn. Remember that you need to be gentle and very careful as it is a sensitive area. Don’t rush to put in more fingers and for the love of god don’t drill into it as if looking for gold! Just take it slow and use your time to explore your partner’s vagina and what gets them off.
Hopefully you found these tips to be helpful and encouraging enough to give fingering a chance and to do it properly. If you have any more questions, Lady Devine will surely be back with more answers.
Until then,
Stay curious,
Stay safe,
Stay Devine!